I'm sure it's something you only understand with experience, but I love my daughters
so much. They are so DIFFERENT from each other! Bedtime tonight has made me reminisce about Katie at the age that Amanda is now (about 20 months). Katie was so independent and fearless. Sometimes that was a huge advantage (like leaving her in nursery, transitioning to a big bed, moving to a new house) but sometimes made me sad. Her independence means she usually has no use for Mom (unless it's to help her climb a tree or fly to the moon!) I sometimes get sad that she doesn't "need" me as much, she's not as affectionate. Amanda, however, could be represented as Katie's opposite in so many ways. Amanda has some fierce stranger anxiety (pretty much never crossed Katie's mind, and still doesn't), but she is so affectionate! She gives kisses all the time, she is soothed by hugging a dolly, and when she snuggles----ooooh! It's better than truffles! Her body just molds into mine and she relaxes and I'm sure it's a little piece of heaven!
So, what's bringing all this up? Katie now has bunk beds in her room. Katie is thrilled to be on the top bunk because she's the big girl. Amanda, however, is not thrilled about, well, going to sleep. This might have something to do with a monthly sleepover we make her endure when I go to work. She's not really content to sleep in her crib anymore (alone in a room?), but she doesn't really want to be in the big bed either. With Katie, there was never a tear about leaving the crib behind for a new, big bed, in a new house even. She thought it was fantastic! Granted, she got out to play and often fell asleep on the floor, but she was never sad about it. Amanda, however, is sad if all the little duckies of her security are not in a row! :)
Tonight, after Mandy wasn't happy in her crib, I tried to see if she'd lay down in the big bed. I thought it might be comforting to be in the same room with Katie (as different as they are, they love to be together). Well, that wasn't enough to soothe Amanda. I invited Katie to come lay down in the bottom bunk with Katie. I left the room to give them a few minutes and see how it went. I stood outside the door and listened to Mandy sit up and call for me. Katie would tell her "It's okay, I'm right here!" Mandy was quiet for a few seconds, only to fuss again, and have Katie tell her again, "It's okay, I'm right here!" I was hopeful, but Mandy didn't settle. When I went in after less than ten minutes, Mandy was upset, but she had even spooked Katie who was almost to tears! (It's pretty hard to spook Katie, so it just goes to show how listening to a baby cry can really wear anyone down!) Anyway, we loved Katie and tucked her back in the top bunk, and I rocked Mandy just about to sleep.
Long story short, I am amazed at the different strengths that our Heavenly Father has given each of us. He's blessed Katie with deep courage and belief in self. To Amanda, He's given a tender and affectionate heart. I'm so blessed to have both of them and learn from them, especially as I try to recognize and develop my own talents and traits. Sometimes I think my life would be "simple" or "easy" if I only had to worry about myself. But WOW! I would be missing out on SOOOO much! I am so grateful my Heavenly Father has trusted me with His daughters, even though I fall short in doing as He would do to care for them, so that I can learn from their beauty and goodness. I remember from my Young Women days standing and saying the YW theme, and it means so much more now as I look at my daughters and think of that. Amazing.
Well, good night to my sweet princesses, tucked in their own beds, in their own rooms, in their own sweet dreams for the night.
Here's where I remember Katie at 20 months old:

Although different, they both have a love of shoes! Sorry Dad, it's in the genes!

Katie had no fear, even at 20 months! It was Mom whose heart would catch.

Two going on 20. Katie had my ipod figured out before I did.

Isn't she Beautiful? Katie Then (March 2008) and Now (March 2010).


Mandy loves shoes too! (Yes, those are 3 DIFFERENT shoes).

Story time tucked up under the computer desk. Don't know why that's the preferred location. . .

What a snuggly bug!! Amanda and her "babies".

My sweetheart, Amanda!